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Sep
14

By September 2018 Trump’s behavior had upset most of the rational and intelligent people with a strong enough stomach to listen to his verbal litter, but what about the Vikings? Where do they weigh in on the matter? Some thought they might have favored Trump due to his might makes right modality. Others believe his lying, bitchy, and cowardly behavior would have them chewing on the edges of their battle axes. After an in-depth journey into legends, myths, and more than a few mead halls, I, Alex Bone, can finally bring you the real story.

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Top Ten Reasons Vikings Won’t Vote for Trump

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  1. Because he asked them to.

 

  1. He never uses an axe.

 

  1. Only a fool wears his tie so long, for it is far easier for an enemy to strangle you with it.

 

  1. Vikings never have a pay a woman for sex.

 

  1. Only girly men get bone spurs.

 

  1. Build big wall on river. Very stupid. Sad.

 

  1. Never trust an old man without a beard.

 

  1. Even Loki never lied so much.

 

  1. Someone with a body like his doesn’t deserve to be a narcissist.

 

  1. Viking don’t want to sleep with their own daughter when there are so many other people’s daughters to choose from.

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Sep
11

By September 10th, 2018 Trump’s behavior was more erratic as his allies fell one by one to Mueller, got fired, or fled on their own volition. The Republicans could be sacrificing their party on the long term, to get paid on the short term. Trump is both supporting and destroying the Republicans by getting the youth more involved with politics than ever before. Yet despite trying to destroy the country, the environment, and his political party, it looks like Trump, instead of grabbing a parachute, would rather go down in flames until there is nothing left but ash.

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Top Ten Reasons Trump Will Never Step Down

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  1. Because each time he watches Fox everything looks great!

 

  1. Every week he remains, he’ll be able to destroy more of the USA.

 

  1. No one is more bigly better than Trump

 

  1. If he steps down, how could he be sure the wealthiest 1% will be taken care of?

 

  1. No one else is willing to work as hard to bring about global warming, I mean, if it existed.

 

  1. Dysfunctionalism isn’t something you just walk away from.

 

  1. He would never abandon his loyal employees, now if he could just figure out who they are.

 

  1. It’s hard for someone of his girth to step down off anything.

 

  1. He’d never want to retire, he heard people who retire often start to read.

 

  1. Dictators never step down.

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Sep
10

Hush Sisters Hush by Donald KruegerGenre:  Science Fiction

Publisher:  Xlibris

Published: 2016

Reviewer Rating: 2 Stars

Reviewer:  Michael D. Griffiths

 

 

 

 

Hush Sisters Hush by Donald Krueger can be labeled a science fiction novel in theory, but the vast majority of the novel focuses on people living through normal midwestern lives without conflict or amazing results.

Let me back up a little first. I tend to get a little excited when I receive a strong looking novel from a major publishing house and I look forward to reviewing them. However, I also receive books from first time authors with less known publishers. I like to throw these other authors into the mix as much as possible. I have often been very surprised by these novels. Yet the results are not always so positive.

I was moving into a new place last month and with my books boxed up, I was hard pressed to find a new book to review. Opening a random box, I grabbed the first book I saw, which was Hush Sisters Hush and I wish I had dug a little deeper, but like a good guy (who had most of his books still boxed up) I finished the thing.

The book revolves around a female writer and her newest project who turns out to be a man who’s lived two hundred and fifty years. Geff ages roughly one year for each ten which pass. Sarah begins to investigate and discovers he had led a productive but mostly uneventful life. Soon her research indicates he might be one of six clones which aliens left on earth for no obvious reason. After meeting two more of these slow aging six, Geff begins to try to send a message into space to contact the planet they think they were sent from.

There are more than a few issues I have with this one. First off, there is no adversary, and we are a thousand miles from a protagonist. No one so much as causes the characters a single problem and is nothing but as helpful as they can be. None of the long-lived people suffered a mishap from their fellow man and lived remarkably boring lives. The pace is slow without much really occurring other than people assisting them in learning more about their outer space origin. Then, after a slight build in excitement, their message to their home planet goes unresolved, as is discovering more of the missing clones. Also, Geff gets Sarah pregnant by having sex with her once, but somehow none of the three of them has ever had a child in the last 250 years.

Not too many positives here other than you could read the book to children, although I doubt it would keep their attention. The sisters in the title are the nuns who looked after the clones and the book has a Christian feel, where we could all reach a heavenly nirvana by being polite, white, and rich. Sadly, it is a nice book set in a trouble-free utopian world where everyone is nice to each other, but like most super happy and sweet people, spending time with them tends to get boring quickly.

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Sep
07

On September 4th, 2018 Trump’s Supreme Court appointee Brett Kavanaugh began the process of being approved by the US senate. Throwing all caution, fairness, or logic to the wind, the Republicans are rushing to push this judge through before Trump gets arrested or impeached (maybe both). This move for more power could end up baring the price tag of taking down their whole party, but we will have to wait and see, but for now, in their eyes, Brett is the perfect appointee, so let’s review their reasoning.

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Top Ten Reasons Brett Kavanaugh will make a perfect Supreme Court Justice.

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  1. When he overturns Row vs. Wade it will destroy the Republican party for decades.
  2. Republicans love backing the most unpopular nominee in thirty years, what could go wrong.
  3. Only 71% of United States citizens are for legal abortions so the Republicans do not have to worry about angering them, they will still have their bronze aged base.
  4. Who does not love an old fashioned racist?
  5. Republicans do not need the women or youth vote to win elections.
  6. Because we do not want to be as progressive as Ireland.
  7. We would not want to be more liberal than the pope.
  8. Why not throw a bone to the followers of a dying bronze age myth?
  9. Elected Republicans do not have care about the future of their party because they will not live long enough to see its destruction.
  10. If educated, liberal woman are forced to take their pregnancies to term they will be raising more children who will grow up to be liberal voters.

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Panic business concept psychological health

Sep
03

Top Ten Reasons Michael Cohen is Innocent

 Michael Cohen

On August 21, 2018 Trump’s lawyer and fixer, Michael Cohen, plead guilty to eight crimes, but since many believe Trump can do no wrong, this must be a clever ruse. I mean, come on, Trump never shots from the hip and is always eight chess moves ahead, well, he would be if he learned how to play.

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Top Ten Reasons Michael Cohen Is Innocent

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  1. Because Trump said so.
  2. Because Cohen said so, wait, he plead guilty.
  3. Crimes should only be for the poor.
  4. He’s guilty now, but if Trump pardons him, he’ll be innocent… right.
  5. Facts don’t matter in legal issues.
  6. Pleading the Fifth doesn’t always mean you’re guilty.
  7. Rich white men are always innocent.
  8. Trump’s base wants him to steal from them.
  9. He thought fascist cronies were allowed to steal.
  10. Because feelings are more important than the truth.

 

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Skinjumpers

Aug
26

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Genre: Thriller

Produced by:  Loin’s Gate

Release Date: 2018

Reviewer Rating:  4 Stars

Reviewer:  Michael D. Griffiths

 

 

Sicario, Day of the Soldado was produced by Loin’s Gate and released June 29th 2018. It stars Academy Award Winner, Benicio Del Toro and Academy Award Nominee Josh Brolin. When the government of the United States struggles to discover how a new ring of suicide bombing attacks are occurring on their home soil, the trail leads to Mexican drug cartels who are aiding the terrorists by helping them cross the southern border.

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Josh Brolin plays a fixer for the US and hires one of his best agents, Alejandro, (Benicio Del Toro) to be part of his strike team against the cartel his intel led them to. Action, mayhem, and bullets ensue with some serious nail-biting action. The drug lord’s young daughter is captured, and this helps to insure the region engulfs into a drug fueled war.

Alejandro is separated from his allies and after some mistakes and betrayals, he takes it upon himself to put morality before necessity and protect the daughter he has become the sole protector off. With limited resources, he sets off to smuggle her into the USA. This takes the viewer into the tense situations required to enter the USA illegally.

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Benicio Del Toro

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If you like action, this movie will do it for you. The gunfights appeared realistic and brutal. My favorite part was witnessing how effective helicopters can be, even against will armed and trained opponents.

It you like thrillers there may not be too much to complain about here. It is very violent and sometimes I get disturbed by movies having such a bloody body count and focusing on the irrelevance of human life which so many possess. It is a bleak and depressing movie, which considering the plot, should be no surprise, but this might not be a good date movie.

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Again, the action is high paced, and the tactics used are impressive. Both the main actors are a real pleasure to watch and are what takes the movie into a higher level of excellence. I enjoyed how Alejandro found the path of morality within the building backstabs and bloodshed, but people should consider this a movie which is not for the faint of heart.

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Aug
24

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Genre: Science Fiction

Produced by:  Universal Studios

Release Date: 2018

Reviewer Rating:  3 Stars

Reviewer:  Michael D. Griffiths

 

The Purge focuses on a small family and associated individuals who are living in the area where the first Purge is to take place. The Purge is a night where nothing is illegal, and people can do whatever they wish and suffer no consequences from the authorities. The idea is to test The Purge in this small area to determine whether it should be used nationwide. The people in charge believe the release of aggression will lower crime throughout the rest of the year.

The story focuses on a brother, sister, and her kingpin drug dealing ex. Many people leave before the purge, but others stay to get a cash payoff for doing so. The brother was supposed to leave but then stayed to be part of the purge.

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Once the Purge begins, those who created it, discover these people are not as evil as they might have guessed. After a few hours in, the night becomes more of a street party than a massacre. Growing worried the project might be canceled, the government sends in troops and groups of racist scum.

Soon The Purge turns into a true nightmare as trained troops and white supremist hunt down the black heroes. Most likely they all would perish if it wasn’t for the intervention from the sister’s drug lord ex. He and his well-armed gang take the pawns of the government to town, but even they might not be enough to see these people through the horrible night.

The Purge grows creepier as maniacs in masks and other bizarre gangs take to the streets reminding one a little of The Warriors film from the seventies.

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The overtones of racial conflict are obvious within this film. Blacks are defending their neighborhoods from racist low lives. I certainly have no issue with this and it is fun to see black gangsters blowing away the klan. However, I am not so sure I like the drug lord being the hero of the film, but I suppose it makes sense for there to be some logical reason there would be an armed an organized opposition to the military.

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Despite the spikes of weird villains, I had a hard time getting too excited by this movie. It seemed everyone was prepared except the victims, who found themselves alone in the streets when it was a bad place for them to be. Again, I’m not sure a drug pusher is my idea of a good hero. So simply put, the villains were more interesting than the heroes here. I think with a little tweaking this could have been a lot better. It just strikes me as an interesting idea which was used to propel the movie through a quickly and poorly written plot.

However, if you like strange adversaries and enjoy the chance to see black heroes take down some racists and other killers for hire this is a fun rump. Might be good for a Friday night movie of the sofa, but I would not rush to the theater for this one.

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Skinjumpers

Aug
21

On July 20, 2018 Amazon’s owner, Jeff Bezos, was considered the richest man in modern history (Besides Putin). So, Amazon is obviously doing well. However, since they are always looking to get a hold of more of your hard-earned cash, they are searching for new eye grabbing slogans. Some work better than others and here is a list of the ones which have not made it to banner ad status.

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Top Ten Slogans Rejected by Amazon

 

  1. We want all the money.

 

  1. If slavery wasn’t illegal, we’d sell them too.

 

  1. Keep buying or Jeff Bezos might only make 240,000,000 dollars a day.

 

  1. You can give us your paycheck without leaving the privacy of your own home.

 

  1. Where else can you be naked and still buy clothes?

 

  1. You might as well support us because you’ll probably be working for us soon.

 

  1. New Alexa app spends your whole paycheck for you.

 

  1. No need to feel guilty about not shopping locally, because now you can’t.

 

  1. We help promote homogeny worldwide.

 

  1. Now you can help destroy the middle class in the comfort of your own home.

 

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dead

Aug
17

Yeah it might had been a good idea in 1788 to think all states should have an equal vote in the senate, but now that 25% of the USA gets 80% of the votes, we are starting to develop a serious issue unless you like your country controlled by people believing in a bronze age cult and the being the puppets for the top 1%, but who doesn’t want to vote for such issues again and again…

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Top Ten Reasons Its okay for 25% of the USA’s population to control the Senate

 

  1. It gives smart kids an excuse to move to Portland.

 

  1. Keeps the south from rising again, since why would they need to?

 

  1. Some of the ultra-rich are forced to live in the red states which is the closest thing they’ll do to help provide housing.

 

  1. Jesus would have wanted the poor to make sure the mega rich got a tax cut.

 

  1. Sometimes smart people are too darn big for them breeches.

 

  1. The minority controlling the majority in the senate kinda cancels out us all being economically controlled by the wealthiest 1%

 

  1. We wouldn’t want the high-tech states to lead us into the future.

 

  1. Who doesn’t think a bronze age cult full of contradictions and crafted to fit the wishes of those in power when we still thought washing was a bad idea, shouldn’t be the morale backbone of the ecommerce age?

 

  1. Why not jerrymander every aspects of politics to help keep an outdated method of Oligarchy thriving, consistency is good.

 

  1. It’s always nice to have someone to blame the Apocalypse on.

 

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Aug
15

Connect by Julian Gough

 

Genre:  Cyberpunk

Publisher:  Random House

Published: 2018

Reviewer Rating:  4 Stars

Reviewer:  Michael D. Griffiths

 

 

Connect by Julian Gough is a book which does not fit in accepted genres well. Some might what to label this as a Science fiction novel, but I am going to have to go with Cyberpunk this time. The novel focuses on a mother’s relationship with her son Colt with her ex-husband coming into play in an important matter later.

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CyberHead

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Colt’s mother is a scientist more interested in scientific advancement than accolades. Colt is a netrunning cyber whiz who has a hard time leaving the online world he helped create and returning to what he calls ‘crapworld.’ Because of his love for the e-world, he has developed little in the way of social graces and has a hard time doing something as simple as eating.

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cyber punk girl

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Yet when Colt meets a cute girl and completely blows it, he wants to figure out a way to improve his skills. His answer is to ingest his mother’s untested experiment designed to create advancements within the human brain. While he is doing this, his mother is finally presenting her findings. Her divorced husband knows of her research and thinks she is a security risk to the USA and begins to not only shut her down but eliminate her by starting up an outlawed AI defense program. Soon this program is hunting down Colt and his mother and only his accelerated brain along with his high-tech skills will give them a chance to escape.

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cyber kiss

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This is a long novel and takes a little while to build up momentum, but it has fine character development and insight. Also, if you can wait for a while, there is a good amount of action and nail biting.

Downsides for me were again my pet peeve for changing points-of-view without a break. It just seemed the author would flip from one person’s POV to the next chaotically as he felt fit. I am surprised Random House did not correct him for this, but what do I know about what is acceptable these days? Sometimes Colt’s complete social incompetence was nerve-wracking and painful to experience, but perhaps this will be a common thing we will have to deal with as parents bring up future generations in our world of magic rectangles.

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Cyber city

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It is great to see another powerful and up to date cyberpunk novel. Well done here. I think the author predicts much of what will one day be happening in our world. The novel feels well researched and thought out. I would recommend this to all lovers of cyberpunk, science fiction, and people having issues with their teenagers growing up in our increasingly high-tech age.

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Cybergirl